maybe we shouldnt want halting machines

when they found, your body; giant x's on your eyes. with your half of the ransom, you bought some sweet, sweet, sweet... sweet sunflowers. and gave them, to the night.

"what if there is no tomorrow? there wasnt one today."

i think we should plant lots of trees on top of every building. i think that would look neat. i suppose itd be difficult, with having to place a lot of dirt up there and maybe it wouldnt be easy to keep the trees healthy and surviving... but you could certainly design around the needs and plan for such a setup in future buildings. it would be pleasing.

it seems to me that three-symbol turing machines should be reducible to two-symbol turing machines, right? so why do the busy beaver programs not having similar limits?

also, how many n-symbol, m-state machines are there for a given (n,m)? and what portion of (n,m) machines halt? it suddenly makes me think of something i wrote as "multidimensional permutations/combinations". ill have to think more about what that might mean before i declare it stupid.

i recently found out that Maxwell originally derived his equations through his knowledge of fluid mechanics, which i find very interesting, especially since fluids have some major hurdles to overcome still, such as turbulence (Werner Heisenberg was asked what he would ask God, given the opportunity. His reply was: "When I meet God, I am going to ask him two questions: Why relativity? And why turbulence? I really believe he will have an answer for the first.")

in a similar vein, superconducting has been piquing my interest lately, and i wonder what sort of parallels it has with superfluidty.

so that slow sort of learning, that occurs over a long period of time... there is no good word to describe it, the best i can do is to say it is the antonym of an ephiphany, in some sense. no matter: ive experienced it once again. this time it was in relation to my struggle to be a strict physicalist (which i really always have been) and to still value the universe, or more specifically, life, and even more so humans. as usual, the solution wasnt really any solution at all, just plain acceptance that the only reason there was a problem was because i conceived of one. that seems to happen a lot more often than you (or more i) would expect.

if i am ever homeless i want to wear a really dirty santa costume. time for art. the title of this entry is a message in hiding; concealed. i wonder if i will be able to look back and remember its meaning?

i need pressure! more pressure! i think it would help if i thought i were competing; for girls, for school, for life. yeah, that might motivate me? maybe?

Karen Owens wrote:
can omniscient god, who
knows the futures, find
the omnipotence to
change his future mind?

"There are a number of different alethic modalities: logical possibility is, perhaps, the weakest, since almost anything intelligible is logically possible: Possibly, pigs can fly, Elvis is still alive, and the atomic theory of matter is false.
Likewise, almost nothing is logically impossible: something logically impossible is called a contradiction or a logical falsehood. It is possible that Elvis is alive; but it is impossible that Elvis is alive and is not alive." so apparently someone, (probably a long time ago) realized that to be omniscient and omnipotent doesnt really make sense.
Thus it is possible that Jones was murdered if and only if it is not necessary that Jones was not murdered.

firing squads are so we can both sleep well at night. so we can both tell ourselves "it wasnt me". but that doesnt work, it doesnt work.


promise to be kind

the eighth
mistake of the week. mistake of the weak? some informations flow faster than others. its a light youre after, cause light moves faster. human beings will do great things in my lifetime, and mostly, no one will understand them.

there should be no hesitation when the coast is clear. isnt that funny, the phrase, "the coast is clear" does it stem from beach invasion?

the nipples of mother hope have run dry

the ninth
Which foot is ugliest: the ugly one or the ugly one missing an ugly toe? Who is bigger, mrs Bigger or Mrs Bigger's baby? (The baby, 'cause it's a little Bigger). two different explanations of the same thing, if valid, are the same thing, not different.

this is good: he says it well.

what other standards can we use? the world is a good place, and worth fighting for... i agree with the second part. can something be not a good place, but worth fighting for? yes. but hell comes to mind. is hell worth fighting for?

without his knowledge links to deception.

'i always lie' --- if it is true then it is false.

twelth...oh wait, thats now!
what sort of relationship can i construct between information and energy? the two must be related... entropy seems to relate them in some sense. the computer scientists seem to have a very good grasp on information, it makes me wonder what sort of insights it could provide to the physicists.

i just got the advice to 'fill every beat with something'.

so bizarre, i really enjoy learning this complex variables stuff, but i dont want to study at all. even though once i start i enjoy it.

"i cant understand why, you refuse my one request; just to press against my weaponry, and then lay bare your chest." mirah, i cant get you of my head; dont misunderstand me, im not complaining.

so what wines go with say... microwave chicken? how about microwaved chicken pot pies? what sort of wine would you say goes with cheerios in milk? how about peanut butter and jelly? wouldnt it be funny to see a wine connoisseur beat me up? i think thatd be funny.

so i was out of my mind a bit for a day there. thank you to anyone who helped correct me. now—im okay—how are you?—thanks for asking thanks for asking—i hope youre okay too.

there is a way there is a way


Now I spend my time listening.

plus... im illiterate

make a lot of fucking noise.
there will be no apologies.

id rather write love notes. I WOULD RATHER WRITE LOVE NOTES. somehow people mistakenly correlate 'intelligence' (whatever that means) with infallibility. --- sentenced to death --- "start with a strong and persistent desire" --- lets take a ride, starfire tonight. ten thousand miles away. --- nobody dreamed youd save the world. --- look for heat and --- it is fixed. it is not fixed. --- ive not been sentenced to death have i?

is the phrase 'they are not the same' equivalent to 'they are different'?

The Bishop says "I'm afraid you've got a bad egg, Mr Jones". Apparently trying to avoid offence the curate replies, "Oh, no, my Lord, I assure you that parts of it are excellent!"

subject: tom dickson and safety
email: http://commercial.blendtec.com/contact.aspx
message: although i am not seriously worried about this, i figured tom dickson might take caution from this short clip:
although the construction of the blender might be such that he is not concerned with any sort similar failures, i did notice that with the hockey pucks, the blender appeared slightly more difficult to control than many of the other items. perhaps he has already taken the necessary precautions, if this email encourages him to take further precautions, i shall not have lived in vain.
thank you,


what syndrome is this: 'the love of everything' ?

http://feareverything.com/ : Now I spend my time listening.
Philippians 2:12: "...continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling."

i need to write an antonym of "fear of everything" = love of everything?

if we can look at the clouds just right, from both manchester and keene, we can figure out where they are; where they shade the world; how high they are. it could be sweet. how many people can lay claim to knowing where the clouds are?

what sort of things are mysterious to you? other than me. i can explain things, i cant explain myself. i traded my soul for the ability to understand the physical universe. it probably wasnt worth it.


off then on. OFFTHENON!

am i out of touch with reality? i kind of feel like it... i dont know though. how could one self-assess such a quality?

'since forever'

"Markov's inequality leads immediately to the third most useful fact in theoretical computer science, called the Chernoff bound. The Chernoff bound says that if you flip a coin 1,000 times, and you get heads 900 times, then chances are the coin was crooked. This is the theorem that casino managers implicitly use when they decide whether to send goons to break someone's legs."

i know youre upset, maybe youd feel better after we had some dirty sex.

according to my string cheese, it takes one week to make a jelly bean. i must confess: ive been selecting my string cheese based on the questions it gives me. ive even been cheating and reading the questions without opening the cheese. i can only eat so much of that crap, you know?


i think one of the most very basic differences in human opinion is the belief that people are inherently good or evil, or neither. i personal tend to believe the good aspect, i think thats what ultimately places me in the optimistic category, even if im not always an optimist. but i feel like many people who's opinions are greatly different than mine are often due to their disagreement on that very basic point. which is fine, i just find it a bit strange, as if maybe we should reduce many different debates all to this one more fundamental one.

where is my cure for this disease?

i can read you like a book. it may be a book about a subject i dont understand. and it may be written in a language i dont know, and encoded with unbreakable encryption, but that book was published and is now collecting dust on my shelf. no wait, i dont want you collecting dust on my shelf (i dont even have shelves).

"you know what hurts the most is the, the lack of respect, you know? thats what hurts the most. except for the, except for the other thing. that hurts the most. but the lack of respect, hurts the second most."

im gonna go stand over there.


you may need a murderer

"one more thing before i go, one more thing ill ask you lord: you may need a murderer, someone to do your dirty work. dont act so innocent, ive seen you pound your fist into the earth, and ive read your books. seems that you could use another fool, well im cool, and i look right through. you must have more important things to do. so if you need a murderer, someone to do your dirty work."

pouring rain yesterday morning was beautiful. a girl on the phone this morning was even more so. the songs, the feelings, the music, the rain, the temperature; a warm wind blowing through a cold window. the streets and lights and flashers... the police lights are so beautiful. i might not yet be human, but i have the potential, and i promise if i wake up human one day, that ill still be me. or at least i hope that i can be both myself and human at the same time. some day, ill show you. ill show someone. some day.

so if i can find a quick way to take a given string, and find a cellular automaton, or some other simple program, that will generate it, then i can prove P=NP. but P almost certainly does not equal NP, so how do we prove that? thats the million dollar question. it seems that the world is np-complete.

bijective is a great word.

"Look, this question of whether P=NP, what can I say? People like to describe it as "probably the central unsolved problem of theoretical computer science." That's a comical understatement. P vs. NP is one of the deepest questions that human beings have ever asked." ----- "(Leonid Levin told me that Feynman -- the king (or maybe court jester) of physicist-intuition -- had trouble even being convinced that P vs. NP was an open problem!)" - Scott Aaronson

"these drugs arent mine! im merely helping someone close to me overcome a drug problem, so i had to take them away, and then i had to drive down the highway as fast as i could to get away from him, but its impossible to get away from him, because that someone is me."

"call me a sexual predator, but when i think of predators i think of lions, tigers, big cats, sharks. this isnt so much a predator versus prey relationship. this isnt a scavenger a vulture or a laughing hyena versus a carcass. this isnt a parasite versus a host. we're all miserable together. its the opposite of a victimless crime."

i want to write a probability paper on russian roulette. that could be quite comical.

our greatest hopes and our worst fears are seldom realized.

i just realized [several hours ago] wikipedia removes the clout of a doctorate, and places credibility in the hands of those who can argue their point well.

i want to get lost. i want to appreciate you all year long.
now you should say something.

ps — so if you need a murderer...